The Well (2023) Review

Lisa Gray (Lauren LaVera) is travelling to the Italian village of Sambuci to undertake a piece of work which will involve restoring a fire damaged painting in the collection of Emma (Claudia Gerini), a wealthy Duchess. Lisa chats to her fellow passengers Madison (Courage Osabohine) and Tracy (Taylor Zaudtke) and their guide Tony (Gianluigi Galvani), which instantly introduces three potential victims, and is then guided to Emma’s mansion by friendly pub owner Marcus (Jonathan Dylan King), which instantly introduces someone who could be hero or villain.

Given strict instructions that the painting must be returned to pristine condition in an extremely tight timeframe, Lisa a) doesn’t think to question why and b) decides to sleep in the same room as the painting in order to “get to know it.” As you do. Before long, there’s the sound of owls hooting and wolves howling as the sun goes down and something grabs Tony, then Tracy and Madison, as they’re camping in the woods. Is Lisa also in danger? Spoiler: yes.

Director and co-writer Federico Zampaglione’s previous movie Tulpa is enshrined in the annals of FrightFest as one of the most memorable events in the festival’s history and, although the screening of The Well was never likely to achieve that level of riotousness, the Glasgow audience was up for a gruesome, good time and showed its appreciation throughout.

The action in The Well takes place in 1993, which means no pesky mobile phone technology to call for help or allow various folks in peril to be tracked. This also amplifies the helplessness felt by its characters as their various predicaments go from bad to worse to even worse in two different strands of the same story which will eventually come together in a satisfyingly bonkers final stanza.

The world of the 1990s is also a good match for its full blooded, Italian horror shenanigans, although the bendy logic and extreme violence on display brought to mind the absolute best of the previous decade’s straight to video releases, complete with wonky dubbing, ripe dialogue, striking locations and, on quite a few occasions, the appearance of Giovanni Lombardo Radice. Of course, the flesh ripping and gut spilling would have been cut by the BBFC to preserve our delicate UK sensibilities. Not so here. And you get a cameo by Giovanni Lombardo Radice. The VHS era version of me felt like standing up and cheering.

As we’re talking about footage that Ferman would have taken the scissors to, this is a good time to voice a hearty “Bravo!” in the direction of special effects maestro Carlo Diamantini, who brings Sergio Stivaletti levels of craft to a series of splattery sequences. Folks are slashed, stabbed, hacked, burned, gouged, disembowelled and generally reduced to a bloody pulp. Gorehounds will feel they’ve been rewarded handsomely by the carnage on display. Creature fans need not feel short changed either, with some beautifully realised, otherworldly creations invading both the dreams of Lisa and the final, all too real moments of those people deemed “monster fodder.”

As Lisa, Lauren LaVera brings a charming vulnerability to the lead, essaying a quieter, more thoughtful role than Terrifier-style kick-arsery, allowing others to get on with the business of chewing the scenery so much you can almost see the teeth marks in it. Step forward, Claudia Gerini, who is nothing short of fabulous, giving it the full ice queen as she lays down the law to all and sundry, including her daughter Giulia (an excellent Linda Zampaglione), who doesn’t attend school due to her severe personality disorder and “doesn’t accept being thirteen.” This kind of detail is all grist to the Italian horror mill and I am very much here for it.

To the casual observer, The Well may, er, well come across as silly, overwrought and frequently repellent but that’s exactly what fans of this type of cinema are seeking. Yes, the violence is gratuitous and nasty, even by today’s standards, but the thrilling contrast between those harrowing images and the stylish cinematography is prime genre fare and harks back to the mind bending excesses of such luminaries as Fulci and Lenzi. While this may not be up there with the likes of The Beyond, few films are. If the occasional moment of humour seems unintentional or lost in translation, that’s all part of the process. If you resist it, you won’t have a good time.

For fans of horror cinema, this is a fun, gory treat. For fans of Italian horror cinema, it’s a strangely heartwarming trip back to a time when slotting a tape into the video player was accompanied by a rush of excitement, not knowing what the hell was about to come next. This is unashamedly enthusiastic filmmaking which makes some fascinating decisions along the way, right down to the brilliantly batshit and unexpectedly cold “thirty years later” coda.

Well, well, well, The Well is rather good.

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