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JonesyTheCat

After floating adrift in deep space for many years aboard the Sulaco, Jonesy eventually crashed to earth. The cryogenic suspension was de-activated and what emerged from the wreckage was a highly evolved, alien hybrid feline... More

Zombies

Dance of the Dead (2008)

Falling into the Idle Hands category of teen horror comedy, Dance of the Dead is the product of low budget filmmaking. It’s one thing to envision this sort of project under lesser funding, it’s quite another to actually pull it off. A certain plastic fantastic veneer is required emulate the kind of MTV movies this […]Read More

Infection

Growth (2009)

Growth won’t ask you out for a second date. It will f**k you and it won’t even give you the courtesy of a reach around – thank you Lee Ermy – It’s a one night stand that will wait until you’re asleep, steal your personal belongings and s**t in your mouth. It will wear your […]Read More

Possession

Legion (2010)

Angel A wants to engage in combat with Angel B; however, Angel A is in possession of a melee weapon and is some distance from Angel B, who possesses a high powered, automatic rifle. To counter this, Angel A envelopes himself in the bullet proof wings that protrude from his back. Angel A can now […]Read More

Monsters Werewolves

Howling II (1985) Review

Much in the same way that Noah constructed the ark under the pretence ‘Build it and they will come’, Howling II – full name: Howling II: …Your Sister is a Werewolf – hinges on the fact that ‘if Christopher Lee is in it then someone WILL want to watch it’.Read More

Psycho

Tony: London Serial Killer (2010)

I am of two minds regarding The National Lottery. On the one hand, it is a reprehensible exploitation of public will. Leeching off of the weak and the desperate, it promises gargantuan cash prizes that will fulfil all of our hopes and desires; fix our broken dreams and elevate our desperate existence through greater material […]Read More