Lake Placid 3 (2010)

Monsters
Cut and Slash
October 23, 2010
0

Yes! Cut and Slash loves blood and he gets it in the first 4 minutes of this film. I couldn’t believe the female character who gets eaten is Roxanne Palett ex-Coronation Street!!! Nice to see some female flesh so early on in a film. Cut and Slash happy!

In Lake Placid 3, a group of gigantic crocodiles terrorizes a secluded country lake. Local wildlife gets mutilated and campers get eaten and then spat out for lunch. I’ve never watched the other Lake Placid films so I have been able to watch this 3rd instalment with a totally open view.

Sadie Bickerman from Lake Placid 2 has died and Nathan and Susan Bickerman with their son Connor come to her property to clear up and decide what’s best to do with the property. Connor sees the first glimpse of a baby croc as it snatches a lizard for lunch. Connor tries to befriend it (WTF, is he dumb or what?).

Connor continues to feed the crocodile and it’s other friends and also decides that it is perfectly fine to feed adult crocodiles too (Which school of thought did this child attend?). His parents have no idea that he is basically risking his life every time he even visits the lake. They’re too busy with their careers and don’t seem to have any time for him. Strikes me as your normal family relationship!

The family’s friend Vica is employed to look after Connor, but she spends most of her time either watching soap operas or craftily smoking a cigarette. Vica doesn’t look after Connor very well as he goes into town and gets caught shoplifting for meat for the crocs. Vica finds out exactly where Connor has been going when she looks for her dog. Let’s just say anyone for hot dog! Connor and his father have a heart to heart when it’s discovered that Connor has been feeding the crocodiles for months. Nathan’s not happy but he’s put in his place when he’s basically told how crap a dad he has been.

Lesson number one in a horror film: If you’re trying to find out where someone is and you also don’t want to be detected by Crocodiles then please do not start screaming that person’s name at the top of your lungs! Another character Brett does this while he’s searching for his girlfriend Ellie. Sorry kids, but I’d rather let the girlfriend die than risk my life searching for her.

I really wanted to enjoy this film but unfortunately I didn’t really get any rush of excitement whilst watching it. It would have also been nice to have felt some form of connection with cast members but to be quite honest I didn’t really care if anyone died or not. The film’s attempts at humour also left no imprint on my brain and the dialogue had none of the great one liners that you normally find in a monster movie.

The CGI although quite good did not convince me the crocodiles were real, so when the crocodiles attacked I was not scared or shocked. The funniest bit in the film is when Nathan has his arm bitten by a crocodile and somehow seems to keep his arm. I’m sorry but if you’re bitten by one of these beasts I have always presumed that your arm comes instantly off. Maybe I’m dumb!

Things are left open for another sequel, so you will have the chance to watch Lake Placid 4 in the near future. I for one am not recommending this film to anybody to watch as I actually found it one of the most boring films I’ve ever watched.

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