Hack Job (2011) Review

Hack Job is a curiosity and an exercise in stupidity. It requires an open-mind. It is not a horror film because it’s not scary. It is funny (in a cheap mean way) but at whose expense? “You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll see mummies die in the Splatstick comedy adventure that is Hack Job! A must-have for any gore geek and gratuitous nudity aficionado.”
All readers who are easily offended should stop reading now.

hack job 2011

In 1992, Robert Rodriguez (From Dusk Till DawnSin City) made the legendary El Mariachi  with a budget of $7,000. Viewers  and critics positively responded to El Mariachi, a sad poetic action picture with a heart and soul of its own. The film’s mood and music were dreamy and nostalgic, it grabbed everyone’s attention right away.
On the other hand, here comes Hack Job with a budget of $60,000. “A movie’s budget, no matter how high or how low, is not a reason to go to see it.” said Roger Ebert. What can I say? If you love to hate a film while watching it, go buy  Hack Job. People laugh at different things; some viewers may not laugh at the sight of a boom appearing in a shot or (nor interpret it as a homage to Lars Von Trier’s The Idiots), get all upset at the film’s lack of taste.

“A must-have for any gore geek and gratuitous nudity aficionado.” Speaking of bad publicity, the advertisers of Hack Job could not have done a better job advertising their product. If they don’t know how to deal their own product what kind of businessmen are they? Does the film has gore? Yes it does but you’ll either get offended (it’s purposefully cheesy), or roll on the floor laughing or crying at how bad this film. That’s precisely what the nerds who made this film want , of course — the joke is on us, the viewers, we’re the real geeks, according to the maker of this circus geek show. Personally, I hate comedies – they depress me.

hack job 2011 film hack job movie 2011

Hack Job is not a satire because it lacks the intelligence, talent and ambition to be one. The film is so bad it’s funny, in fact it could be interpreted as some kind of parody of independent commercial horror shows but I don’t watch those at all so maybe I didn’t get Hack Job or Hack Job didn’t get me.
Even though it is kind of useless to argue about taste, the violence (if you wanna call it that) in Hack Job is cheap and pathetic. The viewers are being f*cked with, cheated and manipulated by some guy’s f*cked-up idea of fun. Does the star, writer, producer and director James Balsamo thinks this junk food for the brain is funny? Most assuredly.
At least it’s not boring though and Balsamo could be the reincarnation of Wayne Gayle and thinks of us, his viewers as nitwits in zombie land eager to lower ourselves.

Now the ‘gratuitous nudity’. Do any of you guys out there like to see giant breasts full of milk on screen? If so, go and buy F*ck For Dollars 3 starring the lovely Sasha Grey (The Girlfriend Experience). It’s the best American porn flick I’ve seen and has a genuine sense of humour. In one hell of a scene a gorgeous sexy blonde walks around trying to find a man to have sex with on film. We watch as she seduces a guy who’s recycling offering him money to have sex with her in front of the camera. The guy begins to bargain with her and play head games (“I don’t know… $40? What if my parents will see it? How about $60?”) and it’s funny not only because of the situation but because the typical porn roles are reversed. Although the scene is staged it is way better acted than all the acting in Hack Job .
What does that tell you about  this film? To say that the acting is worse than you see in a porn flick is to put it mildly. Usually, comedy in porn films is as terrible as the acting and it’s the same situation with Hack Job.

Hack Jobs film 2011

At least porn films deliver the goods as it were. The widely publicised ‘gratuitous nudity’ in Hack Job consists of some brief shots of a ugly pair of pierced breasts and filthy tattoos of one or two ladies. Nothing more.
Yeah, it’s hilarious, isn’t it?

Movie Rating: ☆

☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ 



Jack Torrance

i like candies.

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  • I like how you censored all the “fuck”s except the first one.

  • avatar
  • Oops. But there were just so many!

  • avatar
  • I hate censorship. Censors suck!

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